Prayers are being answered in my life!
Before I got arrested, I asked God to take certain people out of my life. I knew it was impossible for me to just walk away from my life - so I begged for God to fix it. And although becoming a criminal was not what I had in mind - coming to jail definitely removed me from a life of sin and all the unhealthy relationships I was involved in.
I have finally been able to forgive everyone that has stolen from me and taken advantage of me while I have been here as well. Being unforgiving was only building up anger and bitterness in my heart! And in a place like this - there is no room to be angry!
So, I have decided to let it all go. Up until now, I have been sweating over getting my computer back, and my stuff that never made it from Phoenix -- but, I prayed about it....again...and again...and God finally revealed to me that I was to just let it go! Let go! And Let God!!
I had letters written and everything...demanding my stuff be returned to my family! But I ripped them up and threw them away.
And do you know that I haven't thought about the things that I "used" to have since.
(Although I was browsing through the Sunday paper planning what I am going to have one day when I get out.)
But it will be different because it will be something I have to work for...and save for...Not something that was bought with drug money! And even if I don't get it in this life - because I know that money will not be falling out of my pockets like it was before - even still - I am ok with it because in Heaven, I will have one of everything - but it will be better than what I had before - better than what I could imagine - it will be a gift that is given to me and will never be taken back! Mine for eternity...there are no Indian givers in heave - that's for sure!
:)
So, I am finally okay with what was lost. And from now on - there is no looking back.
Randi
9/24/2008
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2 comments:
It's so good to hear from you - it seemed like forever since the last letter! I guess Shauna was just waiting for me to get all the blogs sent to you before adding new ones! :) We love you and think of you everyday!
Randi,
I received your thank you card for the book. I love the card and the verse you wrote inside. The book was recommended for you by your sweet sister. I’m sure you will enjoy it.
I wanted to share with you a little of how your past life style and my world connect. My daughter was married with a two year old baby girl when our world changed overnight. She finally stopped covering for her husband’s drug problem, left him and moved back home. It has been five years since that happened and now she is remarried to a good hearted man and they have a son. My grand daughter is now seven and knows that her daddy is in prison. We have tried to tell her enough without going into all details (a seven year old has big questions). She knows he did something bad and is being punished. We have allowed her to visit him and she does wonderful with understanding. I know the day will come very soon that we will have to answer even bigger questions and share more of this horrible addiction he and so many others have had with her. I pray that he will grow and learn from this. I am so very proud of your attitude and I will continue to keep you on my prayer list until I can praise God for your release and fresh start. May God bless you!
Love,
Debbie
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